From above verse we see that strife usually goes along with contention. One cannot do without the other. The Bible tells us that “Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of Go”. (Gal.5:20,21. I do not know about you, but to me the list Paul gives us here is quite revealing. Revealing in the sense that strife is regarded as sin of which if we thrive on it, we will certainly not inherit the kingdom of God,. On the other hand the sins listed by Paul reveal us that idolatry, witchcraft, hatred and the like can and usually do, lead to strife!
Drunkeness very often leads to strife, jealosy also. What about wrath, murders, revellings and heresies? They too lead to strife. Salomon told us that: “A wrathful man stirreth up strife: but he that is slow to anger appeaseth strife”(Prov. 15:18). That is very true, people who harbour wrath in their hearts usually ventilate this wrath by anger and anger leads to strife. Strife can become quite bitter and violent, sometimes even leading to death. Usually strife comes due to a lack of agreement between two people. Oh, and how often does this not happen within the Christian community? Between Christian marriages? Way too often!! In marriage usually strife happens when there is no harmony between the spouses, when there is a power struggle going on between the two spouses as to who is the strongest (more often who is right and who is not). Let me explain.
In my view, due to the so called emancipation and equal rights movement for women, many women have changed from being housewives, into independent women who want to take care of their own. Their whole outlook on life has changed due to this process, and the family life has changed also. The rolemodels within the family have changed. It is not father who brings in the money and is the head of the household (as God planned it) anymore, but nowadays the wife takes the same authority role within the family as the husband. And this brings lots of strife! Men have a hard time adjusting to this role mode, partly because it has been ingraved in their genes for centuries, that they are the heads and providers of the household. Nowadays society promotes ‘succesful career women’and unpromotes ‘traditional housewives’. It is almost a shame when someone asks you what you do, and your answer is housewife.
With this change of settings within the family, the whle Godly family structure has dissapeared. We are no longer men’s companions (Gen. 2:22; 3:16) but more likely their equals. Attitudes change from this change of society and the husband no longer is the authority within the house. “But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God”(1Co 11:3). God’s word is severly violated in today’s society. It is deemed old fashioned for women to be obedient to their husbands. Whenever they requiere obedience strife and contention starts. “The beginning of strife is as when one letteth out water: therefore leave off contention, before it be meddled with”(Prov. 17:14).
Women today want to be masters of themselves and not being subservient to their husbands. Apart from a succesful career, they want children and a husband, but while wanting this all, are living under a complete state of stress. Stress is number one factor for strife. So again, strife within the home happens.
Look, let’s be very open about this. If you can combine all of them succesfully and still have a family life which is blessed, you are blessed indeed, for many women simply cannot. They walk around exhausted but will not give in. God has not given us this rolemodel for nothing. A lot of coupples who both work and have children, have children with problems. Children need traditional upbringing, a mother that is at home whenever they come home from school. They need the caresses of mom the loving words and the discipline. In my view society is paying an expensive price for this change. Children are more mature at an early age, dabble in the occult, drink and have sex at fairly young ages. All factors that cause major strife within the family. In my view Salomon was correct when he said “Better is a dry morsel, and quietness therewith, than an house full of sacrifices with strife”(Prov. 17:1)
But how are we going to change this situation? We all know that we cannot change society, emancipation has been deeply rooted within society and it is not going to leave. So I guess we have to find a way around it, in order to serve all. First of all we have to stop thinking only about what ‘rights’we as individuals have. Especially usChristians, should take care of not falling into this thinking, for Christian living admonishes us to serve others instead of putting us first. “For, brethren, ye have been called unto liberty; only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh, but by love serve one another”(Gal.5:13. God tells us if we honour His commandments, He will bless u (Deut.11:27). We all are in need of His blessing, nobody can do without it. I think we need to go back into traditional family rolemodels but not entirely, for society is too much changed to have entirely old family traditions. But, women if they can and must, should remain working, but they should give honour and respect to their husbands. Husbands in return, as the head of the household, and as those responsible before Christ for their family, should also respect their wives and kids. They should take proper care of the family. Establish a harmony family life, where strife has no place.
Strife attracts demons. The Greek were familiar with these, for they called the demon of strife Eris. The demon of contention is called in the Greek Amphilogiai. So you see that the demon of strife does not come alone, he usually comes with Amphilogiai, the demon of contention. You should be aware that Satan’s primary target is the family. He wants to destroy the family. Families where there is much strife and no respect for God’s commandments are an easy target. Usually these families are full of demons and curses. They struggle a lot. An environment full of strife is an open doorway for demons. Families with children where strife is rampant, will see that their children will develop contentional attitudes. Besides, your kids will be open for all kinds of demons, of which later they will suffer. So I urge you to find a good solution to your strife, if you are a person that thrives on strife, get help, get counseling. Not only for your own good but for the good of those around you. Are you a person that is suffering due to much strife? Get counseling too, for most probably you will carry demons of strife with you.