This topic is a difficult one. Why? Simple, because many of us do not want to forgive or many of us think we have forgiven while in reality we have not! One thing you must be aware of: Unforgiveness brings a curse. Disobeying God's commandments will put you under a curse from God himself! You do good to remember that. If you harbor unforgiveness in your heart, you are under a curse from God. Let’s see what the Bible has to say about forgiveness.
“For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” Matt 6:14-15
From this verse we see that Jesus explicitly told us to forgive one another, otherwise we will not be forgiven either from our trespasses by God. You may think to yourself that it is very easy for me or for others to tell you so, for we do not have any idea what someone has done or put you through. That might very well be the case, but God nevertheless has ordained us to forgive. No matter how hard it may be or how unwilling you are to forgive that person, you must forgive! Unforgiveness opens the door for bitterness in your heart. Bitterness is like a poison that will end up consuming you before you even know it! Furthermore, if you harbor unforgiveness in your heart, you will never get over the issue nor the person who has hurt you.
You will spindle and run in circles remembering that which has been done to you, talking and moaning about it, sometimes even fuming, while all the while this unforgiveness is consuming you. You need to remember that the more you thrive on an issue, the more fire will be lit up on it and the more it will burn. To forgive means to move on in life, to leave bad and hurtful things behind, to let go of those thing which have been done unto you. God will take care of those issues, or people who have wronged you, believe me, He will judge and when He does, it will be fairly. All we have to do is to follow His commandments and forgive in order for Him to bless us, in order for us to have communion with Him, to sense His love and to hear His voice. You may now say okay I have forgiven him or her but he or she continue to hurt me. How many times do I need to forgive? Well, take a look at what Jesus said:
“Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.” (Matt 18:21-23)
We are to forgive every time someone hurts us. This is very important. You need to know that Satan is right there watching you and if you refuse to forgive just this one time, He will enter God's court to accuse you of your sin and petition his right to enter your life and create havoc in it (Rev 12:10). Satan will send demons into your life to destroy it. He thrives on your unforgiveness for he knows that it is a sure way for him to destroy you. He then sends his army of demons of hatred, anger, bitterness and whatever he can to enter in your life and to utterly destroy you. You will find yourself harboring all kinds of negative feelings which you do not want to possess. You want to get rid of them but you do not know how. Do not let this happen, not even if the hurt is real big! Do not give way to the devil in your life. Furthermore, God tells us not to judge when we are angry and hurt. Many of us run to judge a person whenever he or she has wronged us. How many prayers are not being prayed to God to judge someone?
However, God will not answer these prayers for this kind of prayers are evil in His sight. God will answer your prayers however, if you pray to bless those who hurt you and when you forgive them (Matt 5:44). God promises that He will avenge us for what is done to us (Rom 12:19; but it is up to God as to how He will do it. It is not for us to demand nor to avenge nor to judge anyone. We all make mistakes in our lives, and we all will offend someone at some point or another, sometimes even without us knowing that we have offended someone. God is a fair God, thus, if you ask for someone to be judged, you will get judged yourself also! You are no better than that person, nobody is, nobody is perfect, we all bear sins of our own. If we want someone to be judged, these sins will be held against us. So do not be a fool and do not give Satan any foothold in your life. No matter how hard the pain is, try, do your utmost best to forgive. For your own good!!
“Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven: Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again.”
Luke 6:37-39
We can thus conclude, that forgiveness is essential for our right standing with God. “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God”(Rom.3:23). Nobody of us is perfect, we all have our faults and we all sin in some way or another. More important, we all are in need of forgiveness, nobody exempt.
Many times throughout our lives we inter-relate with people. Sometimes, without even knowing, we have hurt someone. This has happened to all of us. And many times, people without their knowing, have hurt us. What happens if you do not forgive them? Well, first of all, all contact will break off. Second of all, you become angry, and this can lead to rage or even bitterness. How many people have not committed murder because of pains inflicted upon them, for which they have not forgiven the person(s)? Many times! Just take a look at the statistics.
Forgiveness is so important because it sets us literally free. Free from bondage, free from anger, free from rage, from bitterness etc. You need to know that unforgiveness is a doorway for demonic manifestation in your live. Satan thrives on unforgivenss of people. He loves it, because in this way he gains an entrance into your life and he will do everything possible to control it.
We have an obligation, as Christians, to bind and expel all demonic activity in our lives. Jesus Christ's defeated Satan at the cross, but we need to maintain him out of our lives. Satan is a liar and he will try to prey on you in order to destroy you. The bible tells us that he is “your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour”. (1 Peter 5:8).He watches your every move, and when you give him the opportunity to enter into your life, he will not think twice about it.
But there is good news. First of all, you start by being obedient to God and forgive. Forgiveness is a process. It is possible that when you forgive someone who may have hurt you deeply that you will not feel forgiveness in your heart. But remember this. God blesses obedience and He wail work forgiveness into your heart. He will heal your heart from all hurt done to you. The important step for you to take here is forgive.
Steps to forgiveness:
Step one: Forgive every person that has hurt you. Make up a list of all persons and forgive each one of them in prayer. (for an example of a prayer see below) Ask the Holy Spirit to bring into remembrance every person that you need to forgive.
Step two: Ask God to forgive you for all your unforgiveness and all your sin that you might have inflicted upon others. Also, pains and hurts that you might have caused without you even knowing it. God knows and He will forgive you.
Step three: Command all demons of unforgiveness to leave your life. Do it like this: “Satan and all you demons of unforgiveness, I bind and command you in the name of Jesus to leave me and my life at once and never come back. I have forgiven and I am forgiven by an act of faith. You have no authority over me any more. Get out of my life now, in the name of Jesus.”
Step four: Do the same with demons of anger, bitterness, etc. as in step three. Cast every one of them out of your life. You will feel the difference at once!
Step five: Now that you have forgiven the person(s), do not think of the incident which caused you grief anymore. Walk in forgiveness. If the devil tries to bring into your remembrance the situation that caused you pain, bind that thought and cast the demon out. Take every thought captive in obedience to Christ (2 Cor. 10:5).